Tag: poverty

Kaveri and me

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We’re at one of our fave eateries this evening — Depth and Green— for a great mix of food, drink and experience.

We both had a lovely green smoothie — delicious, with humous and toast for her and sandwich with egg and cheese and veg for me.

A young woman (I wasn’t organised enough to take photos) walked over to introduce herself.

She’d been watching us and was so impressed with how we related , wanting to know something about us and our magic.

We recalled our first meeting in the park opposite my house in Siddartha layout. Kaveri had been visiting her grandmother who was night-watch woman at a construction site next to the park.

That was five years ago. Wow. It’s hard to believe.

It’s disputed but I recall her saying helloooooo as I crossed the park. She reckons I said hello first. Whatever.

…

I explained, to the young woman, that my wife MAnjula had died seven years ago. She wanted me to help others from a similar background to her. So I appealed for any suggestions for young people I could support. None came forward, until the fateful day I met Kaveri.

She was impressed how we’d created such a positive bond.

We acknowledged how people might misunderstand our situation (old man and young girl hanging out together) but it made her happy to meet us and realised what a positive caring relationship we had.

My role (and that of the other director) in supporting Kaveri is on behalf of our business ‘Manjula’s Mysore’ which has an agreement with her mother and active involvement of her grandmother and auntie.

Footnote

When people get to know my background :

Qualified social worker from over forty years ago.

Manager of social (welfare) services in U.K. including teams of social workers, assessors and carers

Experience working with children and families, intervening to support and protect children, in some senses a ‘policing’ role on behalf of the state.

Risk assessment of families, ensuring they’re supported when experiencing difficulties and intervening to ensure the children are safe

Assessing prospective adoptive parents

Delivering workshops and providing consultancy on values and ethics, guiding businesses to socially responsible (CSR)

Working with Hindu, African-Caribbean, Bangladeshi, Sikh, white working class and disabled people’s communities

Plus I’m supported by a network of childcare professionals and we’re operating on behalf of our company subject to the agreement it has with Kaveri’s mother.

… they realise this is a professional set up with Kaveri’s development and safety as our utmost priority.

So there’s much more to our Manjula’s Mysore’s involvement over the past five years.

In India, nothing is quite as it seems.

Our successful support of Kaveri involves money, skills and help-in-kind from our business and contributions from past guests from around the world. .

Manjula’s Mysore’s Corporate (CSR) Responsibility has now included: creativity days in schools and for forty visually disabled young women, gifting bicycles, teaching/presentations, memorial garden, cycle tours,, accommodation, ‘reflective space’ for young adults, our care for our community.

Matching Money

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Kaveri is already an ace negotiator

I’ve now agreed to match whatever she saves this (financial) year, with the equivalent each year up until she reaches 21.

We’ve started counting her savings and placed them in a box at my home

That’s now over 5,000Rs from the two years I’ve known her, from selling bracelets at the kids market and generally extorting from the foreigners. 🤔🤭🙂

It’ll be put into a protected account so no one else can get their grubby hands on it.

One of the many many lessons I learned from Manjula is how she experienced people, particularly men but not exclusively, and also family members (and first husband) who would take her money, gold and send her out to the moneylenders to borrow more.

We will have protections in place, help educate Kaveri and hopefully the strong woman I know she will become will help safeguard her as an adult.

…

Plus she’s astute at reminding me of my ‘pearls of wisdom’ when I forget to follow my own advice. So we’ll also keep an eye on each other.

..

So Kaveri… the savings are for you to choose how to use BUT it’s a waste to spend on parties. Leave that until you’re rich.

…

Here’s how we arrived here —- from Facebook

Compassion pah … humbug

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I just had to post again. Earlier I reflected my concern about the lack of care and compassion (see last posting) when I stumbled across this photo and dickens quote

Here’s someone’s extreme lack of care and compassion preferring that we don’t support people in poverty, who are clearly undeserving feckless oiks.

Un-bloody-believable.

Except this attitude is all too familiar, but I expect that these people (I’ve made it anonymous as we don’t want to create an internet teacup storm) aren’t demonstrating the slightest bit of self awareness by posting such crap on an insignificant page of old London photographs.

Maybe they haven’t got the slightest idea that our system is slanted in favour of the rich and powerful and blaming the powerless feeds into a narrative that maintains this unsavoury order.

Obviously I am naive about how people just accept the demonisation of poor people. I feel a Brexit moan coming on. Get real old people.

I write this having just returned (I live in India, remember?) from a one room dwelling that would have been no better and probably far worse than where those in the photograph lived.

The people are not to blame for the cycle of deprivation or their lot in life.

In my distorted view. It’s our duty in life to work out how best we can be kind and that includes showing care and compassion with a more equitable share of the resources we have at our disposal.

Assuming the immigration bureaucrats (long story) let me remain in my adopted country, we’ll continue to help where we can, through Manjula’s Mysore.

Kalyuva Mane is a school we support to help children who’ve experienced difficulties in their young lives.

Rebel three

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Eating a lot

But still not enoughD

She’s too thin and her grandmother worries.

We’ve already established a few goody rituals. Stopping for Pani Puri or rice bhath on the street or an ice cream at our usual cafe or as today the whole lot plus roti, dhal and fruit salad back at my house.

She will often ask for a parcel (take out) of what’s leftover her her teenage auntie back at her grandmothers.

A generous foreigner is too good an opportunity to miss and it is summer camp.

She isn’t greedy but is keen to share her good fortune.

Rebellious

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meet Kaveri

over the next few weeks I’ll post an evolving introduction to one of our new friends.

I can hear her now. Her bossy tone wafting over — from her grandmother’s home — on the other side of the park outside our house .

She’s already featured on a few entries on meandmycycle, most notably this month when she joined the ‘Manjula’s Mysore” outing to Kerala. Check here

We began making connections some time ago

So come and say hello to Kaveri…

Rebel Number One, ….an earlier posting saw Kaveri :

⁃ stuffing herself (under her grandmother’s encouragement we’re trying to feed her up, she is very skinny),

⁃ completing her “How to draw almost Everything for Kids’ sourcebook

⁃ playing in the park

and of course she was part of the Madness in Kerala

So why am I introducing you to Kaveri? …. bear with me, you’ll see.

Publish and be damned – a plan is forming.

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Five things lead to a plan

First, a cow peed on the Rangoli.

Missing Manjula. Second Christmas and birthday without her

Next, a dragonfly flew into the hall, circled me and landed on Manjula’s penant that we bought on holiday in the U.K.
Immediately afterwards, a sepia coloured butterfly as a few days earlier also kept circling me.
Some believe that Dragonflies and Butterflies are messengers of love from your dearly departed.

At today’s writers group a presentation from editor Karthika helped clarify what is possible.

I’ve committed to Manjula to write our story with a working title of Full Full. I’ve completed the first draft of many and feels like I’m building the Taj Mahal out of matchsticks. This will take sometime.

Target date March 2022 to complete story

Launch book by August 2022 on what would have been Manjula’s 49th Birthday

Identify Editor, First Readers, Community Publisher advisor,

Create 2000 person mailing list and feature blog posts to help create interest.

Self publish POD and E book with 1000 sale target

Available in Hebden Bridge U.K. and silverfish (mysore) local bookshops.

Next: consider… additional chapters, Children’s book, Online interactive version

Non work station notebooks and printed draft. I have a fountain pen and blank paper. I must be a writer.

Missing my love.

Anita’s Attic

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Sowbhagya arrived with Dosa for her breakfast. The dining table was converted to one of my four workstations but she managed to find space. She was trapped but I blame her. She did show interest. So I launched into the synopsis of Manjula and my story, written for Anita.

SB was immediately engaged and liked it. We both enthusiastically remembered Manjula: her character, her kindness, her fun. SB could see connections with her and other women’s experiences but also how she was especially adventurous, strong and independent in the face of so many challenges.

I’m encouraged.

Last Saturday was the first session of Anita’s Attic. A programme for writers — yes, that’s me, officially a writer, of sorts — over the next twelve weeks.

There’s ten of us in the online group: taught, facilitated and mentored by Anita Nair.

Anita is a famous writer of English novels, here in India. My own favourite is Ladies Coupe and I hope that our story will feature similar expansive characters to help us discover more of India and wonderful people I’ve been fortunate to meet.

New beginnings are disguised as painful ends

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It’s late at night and the page is blank so I turn to Laozi and Pooh bear.

Actually that’s not true. I turn to you…… to help me get the ball rolling, to create and share my and Manjula’s story. It’s the age old writer’s conundrum. As you see I have a pile of full notebooks but how to get the blank page filled to begin to start the actual story. Can you help?

If you know Manjula and I or even if you don’t 🙃 what’s the key ingredients of our story that might interest you or a wider audience. What are the main themes that will interest people?