I’m remembering last years visit and thinking through what I’ll do this time. All rather last minute.
I’ll definitely go camping again this trip, hopefully with my son Oliver and Rachel.
In 2022 I revisited Dorset where we had a family camp on Manjula’s second holiday in England.
After meeting up with our mysore BnB family at WOMAD and knocking on a few of their doors I went camping.
I shouldn’t have been.
It proved to be a tonic.
over to bee-man Stephen to drop our beautiful tent, return the fancy hire car and prepare to return home
In my experience, when grieving, we regularly get ambushed by memories of magical times together. They make me both happy and sad. I’ve learned not to run away but to face them, even create them, so it was ok to retrace my steps.
Thank you for joining my journey and your support.
A wonderful place to visit in south of England.
I’ve been here before with ‘you know who’.
This time it’s not raining
There are always one or two other people but not on the scale of India
While sitting in a cave reminding me of my teenage trip Crete and Joni Mitchell but it’s the family camping visit here to commemorate my eldest son’s wedding and my 60th birthday and with my beautiful wife-to-be makes me happiest.
It was our second big trip together in the U.K.
Baby Dor
above all adding to my magical memories of time spent with my MAnjula
Obviously, I am so grateful because MAnjula and I found each other,.
But as highlighted in one of Oliver Jeffers wonderful books a little girl, in my case two help bring light and joy.
It’s my granddaughter Poppy who lives in London and my ‘adopted’ granddaughter Kaveri who lives in Mysore.
and how fab, that they are both into cycling.
The lifelong friend becomes more manageable through diversion and building more around the grief bubble
Two new friends and an older one have made the biggest difference.
On MAnjula’s death anniversary, we came up with a great idea to celebrate her— even more — by going on holiday to one of her favourite places.
Kannur is where Manjula and I first went on holiday together after our engagement in 2015.
It’ll be a great adventure with MAnjula giggling from the antics of the loosely formed team.
It’s a challenge, anywhere, to bring together fragments of four families with two additions of an Englishman and his dog but this is India. It’ll be OK.
It’s a great way to thank Sowbaghya, Tanuja and Satish for the help they’ve been in so many ways, including setting up the new business.
It’s also an opportunity to spend fun time with Kaveri and her young auntie Rhadika.
We’ve got the go ahead from Kaveri’s mum, Satish has worked it out with the school and Jo will definitely have completed her term.
So we’re good to go…
Wonderful
So which amazing place is going to host this motley crew?
Doing my duty…
When one suffers such loss that forms a trauma and it’s aftermath, it’s an extra challenge to focus on the positive.
It’s especially difficult at anniversary time. There’s a preoccupation with the loss, the guilt, a blaming.
In this month there’s also helpful reminders of good, our wedding ceremonies.
Some might wonder why I follow so ‘religiously’ the traditions. It’s simply my love and devotion for MAnjula.
The day afterwards brings out memories of when she was laid to rest on her bed, outside our house with the tell tale symbols of the smouldering wood informing the neighbourhood what was happening. Next we’d go to the industrial shed-oven aka crematorium and before that a puja by the side led by Manjula’s brother.
A kindly neighbour brought Bhagavad Gita to help emphasise our duty not to become too attached to our loved ones and to help their soul spirit move onto another body.
Here’s me doing precisely that…..
Do follow the link and check the video at the end where I’m at one of the most significant places on Srirangaptnam; visited on every cycle tour over the past ten years.
Smileys appear on our street.
I’m reminded of how I’d felt the need to protect my broken heart — like this one in a bottle — while looking around me at the images of my beautiful MAnjula which trigger happy joyful memories of our wonderful but short time together.
Tomorrow we’ll share a meal with MAnjula and a few close friends.
March is a month of significant memories.
It began with our wedding at the city corporation, followed a few days later with a celebration on Srirangaptnam.
Two years running she was admitted to intensive care and sadly and devastatingly died three years ago on the 23rd.
We do Pooja on that anniversary, help her on her way and remember fantastic times with a wonderful woman.
Here’s a video memory created by our good friend Tom, Manjula showing one of her many skills and most importantly her kindness of giving.
I’m sitting with Lucie in our room, at Chera Rocks, which opens directly onto the beach.
It’s been another hot day which cools slightly as we pass 4 0’clock.
We have been visiting our wonderful friends Sally and Shabaz, before Eastenders Sally sadly returns to the U.K.
Together we’ve retraced Manjula and my steps during previous holidays, including Manjula’s deep desire 😉 to visit the drive-on-beach.
This morning Sally and I walked along the beaches to visit Rosie and Nazir of Kannur Beach House and share my photos of Manjula.
Manjula and I in Kannur to celebrated our engagement in 2015
It’s time for a last swim. We return to Mysore tomorrow.
We did it, followed by a shared shower, Lucie thinks it was all too much. She waits until carefully positioned next to cascade her water drops on my clothes and bag. Ha bloody ha …
Me and MYCycle 