A recent arrival at Manjula’s Library.

There’s a short chapter on ‘the language of love’ my reaction is not surprising, given the subject.

It happens ‘sometimes’. …

There’s a physical tightening of the stomach and a sort of shift in the eyes and forehead leading to the feeling of tears welling and a teeny moisturising of the eyes. I’m still making my way through the fantasy fairground tunnel of love slowly through the thick mud of grief gravy. Whilst I’ll never get to the end I need to ensure I break into the positive memory zones and rediscover tolerance.

On the way I’m reminded of previous moments of our wonderful life that I was lucky enough to share with my MAnjula.

Her love was constant (probably) and consistent built on her strengths of attentiveness and presence. I love her more as I’m share more of its layers passing through this crazy tunnel.

I realise that I’ve written this with John Lennon’s Woman playing in the background and it all started with you are my sunshine.

Lyrics below

Woman
I can hardly express
My mixed emotions at my thoughtlessness
After all, I’m forever in your debt

And woman
I will try to express
My inner feelings and thankfulness
For showing me the meaning of success

…

Woman
I know you understand
The little child inside the man
Please remember, my life is in your hands

And woman
Hold me close to your heart
However distant, don’t keep us apart
After all, it is written in the stars

…

woman
Please let me explain
I never meant to cause you sorrow or pain
So let me tell you again and again and again

I love you, yeah-yeah
Now and forever
I love you, yeah-yeah
Now and forever
I love you, yeah-yeah
Now and forever
I love you, yeah-yeah
Now and forever

——-

You are my sunshine

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy 
When skies are gray
You’ll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don’t take 
My sunshine away

The other night, dear
As I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you 
In my arms
When I awoke, dear
I was mistaken
So I hung my head and cried

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy 
When skies are gray
You’ll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don’t take 
My sunshine away