Tag: Mysore

This week

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March is a month of significant memories.

Always Together

It began with our wedding at the city corporation, followed a few days later with a celebration on Srirangaptnam.

Two years running she was admitted to intensive care and sadly and devastatingly died three years ago on the 23rd.

We do Pooja on that anniversary, help her on her way and remember fantastic times with a wonderful woman.

Here’s a video memory created by our good friend Tom, Manjula showing one of her many skills and most importantly her kindness of giving.

Making Connections

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Meeting people, making new and celebrating old friends is what it’s about.

We’ve missed that over the past two years but things are changing.

This lovely family who look after a construction site, live over the other side of our park and have become good friends.

Their teenage daughter Radhika is dressed up for ethnic day at school.

Occasionally the bundle of fun, Kaveri, their granddaughter, also visits from the other side of Mysore and brightens our lives.

We look forward to more ….

Philosophical thoughts

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India stimulates all sorts of reflections like …. What’s the purpose of the line?

a boundary, a border, between in and out? Here and there? Normal and abnormal? The limen … an important guide, the threshold, between one world and another.

If India is anything to go by, it may have no use, other than helpfully creating ‘purposeful’ work.

I pity the poor guy — with his trusty leaf blower and a hanky round his mouth, — who momentarily shifts the dust from the road and into a cloud to probably help the paint stick,

On both our trips to England, Manjula was amazed and intrigued at how the traffic stayed within the lines that marked the lanes.

CAVA

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Our very local art college had an open day today.

This is possibly my favourite but it’s impossible to choose.

We have great friends from here including Punith, Karan and a couple of the wonderful lecturers.

Today, new friends, Fab students gave me their precious time and wonderful insights.
Which carried on in the evening with great entertainment
And to prove I’m Indian I just had to take a selfie.

Wedding part two

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The morning after the reception.

Timings are followed exactly (9.00 to 9.30 am) unlike the night before when things hadn’t started almost two hours after the advertised time.

The knot is tied and I’ve poured milk, gently thrown rice and had tiffin.

Behind the scenes in the choultry or wedding hall is the sort of place where Manjula started working.

The bride’s proud father

Weddings, I’ve seen a few.

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Wonderful decoration at Lakshmi’s parent’s house next door and after twelve years living here I still forget and turn up on time. Where is everyone?
The tying of the knot is actually tomorrow. This is the reception

Thankfully it’s filling out and I recognise a couple of people, so correct day and place.

I’m in a new phase in addition to visiting places where I’ve already been with Manjula, like many of the central London attractions, I now find myself wishing she was with me in new situations.

Well she is !
Ripples of excitement as people are recognised and celebrated.

These are critical events in connecting community.

It’s getting late and nothings happened yet. I haven’t planned this properly and should have eaten. I might beat a hasty retreat.

I’ll be back in the morning.

Tomorrow Lakshmi and Sunil tie the knot. Today at reception, only soft drinks, it’s gifts and photos.

grief gravy

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I have swam in it, swallowed it, fought it, opened my arms to it, shrivelled from it, tolerated it, hated it,.. It’s hit me like a personal tsunami, been wishy washy, sticky beyond treacle, invaded my brain to make it fuzzy and cracked open my tentative comfort zones. I know it’s a lifelong friend I have to accept it. It’s equal with and probably surpasses the combined effect of all the worse times in my life and for the first time uncovered real solid regrets.

It’s a gravy train that doesn’t bring benefits or maybe it does.

My heart was broken by losing Manjula, I covered it up and held it close but now I’m beginning to feel able to open my heart again. So there are positives to discover and learning to reveal.

I now love Manjula even more and in ways that I couldn’t imagine. I’m tentatively beginning to be kind to myself.

Part two of this series of postings is the heart

Thank you for your support during this horrendous journey.

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I love you Manjula