Category: ManjulasMysore

Help – Break the crate..

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Revealing possibilities

Broadening Horizons

Passing through Barriers

Help girls (and boys) prepare for adult life by introducing yourself and sharing your insights. 

Manjula’s Mysore is inviting its guests and members of its monthly meeting: ‘reflective space’ to create a short   Introductory video — talking to camera — to reveal what’s possible.

I often use the story of Ganesh and his brother racing each other to reveal to young people that we live in many different worlds — with our immediate family, at home, with friends, at work, our extended family, while travelling. 

It’s important to recognise and value difference reflected in those different worlds. That helps us to realise what wide variety of opportunities exist for us.

Many young people don’t understand how different their lives could be.

If we know more, we’re more enlightened and can better choose the life we wish to have, and find what suits us best.

Breaking the crate.

It might mean challenging the status quo and breaking away from what’s traditionally expected of us.

Sharing examples gives others strength.

This idea came from how much Kaveri learned about other people’s worlds by meeting guests of all ages — from India and around the world—- at Mysore Bed and Breakfast.

I hope this helps broaden her horizons and seize opportunities

Manjula realised — that even with a limited education, from a poor background having experienced so many difficult challenges throughout her life — she could create a wonderful home, share it with people from around the world, become a company director, manage our business and teach a Firangi a thing or two!! (Many things actually)

Manjula continues to give.

Look at what she had to put up with …

Surely you can do better than this!!

Friends become family.

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Another example of our wonderful guests, that become friends and how our chosen family now spans the world.

How lucky are we?

Here’s this weeks Facebook posting from them. ….

Ten years ago when we planned a visit to Mysore with children for the first time, we  wanted to give them a unique experience. After lots of googling we chose an english man Stephen Farrell’s , Mysore Bed and Breakfast. It was a home away from home where travellers from different part of the world prefered to stay during their Mysore visit. 

 Stephen shares his home with guests and offer complimentary home cooked tasty breakfast. All the guests share the same table  conversing  with each other during breakfast. 

Warm hospitality shown by  Stephen, Manjula and their lovely Lucy remained as fond memory with us, especially with Dhrithi n Diya.

We were in touch with Stephen through Facebook and we knew what’s happening in his life. He married Manjula but unfortunately their time together after marriage was only for short duration due to untimely demise of Manjula.  Stephen gave a beautiful experience to Manjula during her life time. He traveled with her to different tourist destinations, took her to his home country twice, Introduced her to his family and friends. He loved her unconditionally, gave best treatment possible and tried to fulfill her dreams. The days spent with Stephen might be the happiest moment in Manjulas life.

 Few days ago, i. e. After ten years we got the opportunity to visit Mysore again with daughters.  Dasara Celebration was just over but vibe was still there.  Dhrithi Diya didn’t show  any interest in seeing palace, decorations,  exhibition or lightings. Instead they wanted to meet Stephen at his place. We were meeting him  after ten years but surprisingly we didn’t feel the time gap and the connection was instant. He  interacted and narrated stories with same enthusiasm, Lucy was as lovely as she was before. Beadu cat is the new addition to the family.  Even we could feel the presence of Manjula in every room every corner of that  house. Stephen manages public garden in front of the house in her memory. Stephens eternal love towards Manjula is incomparable. 

He converted one room to Library in Manjulas memory. He showed his collection of books to Dhrithi Diya. He is keeping Manjulas memory alive through various activities including reading activity for youths.  Dhrithi n Diya received godfather card from Stephen . And he said only few children recived that card from him so far and he will support them always .

Stephen  conducts MyCycle, tour on Cycle to various parts of Mysore and surrounding villages. He has good knowledge about India, he apreciates cultural diversity, craftsmanship, artifacts & practices of India. He loves to interact with people from diverse background , celebrate festivals. He has deep understanding about the essence of India and some time I feel he is more Indian than many of us.

He shares his experience and memories in his blog

 https://meandmycycle.com/2023/10/31/guests-become-friends-2/

Their Facebook entry

https://www.facebook.com/share/WC6vpdovNcwwwRZY/?

Manjula and Ina

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Manjula and Lucie (our dog) Welcoming Ina to our home.

After that first visit she would field questions from our guests who came to share our home — Mysore Bed and Breakfast– were we a couple?

Ina acknowledged before us that we’d fallen in love.

Ina came every year (except during the pandemic) from that first visit, for a total of ten years. She became a very close friend of my wife Manjula and a great support to me helping me grieve Manjula. She was our favourite and most regular guest, here Ina is promoting us with the new mug and proving she became an essential part of the team (furniture!).

The photos are from our last year with Manjula visiting the local Tibetan settlement and Somnathpur Temple. Ina, Manjula, Willan (our workawayer in 2018) and myself, Stephen

I was their sometime chauffeur

Together, celebrating Manjula’s last birthday in 2018

There’s more here including Ina’s visit a month ago

We will miss Ina, a wonderful caring character, who has become part of our life, here in Mysore. After Manjula died she often referred to her as a Lotus who had survived and thrived through the mud. They both radiated their goodness as sisters and had a wicked sense of humour

Ina lit a candle for her and what we’ll do each year is a Puja for both Manjula and Ina to help their spirits find their new home.

Just as we recently did for Manjula

We look forward to meeting again

Stephen

Matching Money

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Kaveri is already an ace negotiator

I’ve now agreed to match whatever she saves this (financial) year, with the equivalent each year up until she reaches 21.

We’ve started counting her savings and placed them in a box at my home

That’s now over 5,000Rs from the two years I’ve known her, from selling bracelets at the kids market and generally extorting from the foreigners. 🤔🤭🙂

It’ll be put into a protected account so no one else can get their grubby hands on it.

One of the many many lessons I learned from Manjula is how she experienced people, particularly men but not exclusively, and also family members (and first husband) who would take her money, gold and send her out to the moneylenders to borrow more.

We will have protections in place, help educate Kaveri and hopefully the strong woman I know she will become will help safeguard her as an adult.

…

Plus she’s astute at reminding me of my ‘pearls of wisdom’ when I forget to follow my own advice. So we’ll also keep an eye on each other.

..

So Kaveri… the savings are for you to choose how to use BUT it’s a waste to spend on parties. Leave that until you’re rich.

…

Here’s how we arrived here —- from Facebook

Recognising Buddhism

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The flag.. a gift from Bylakuppe

  1. Just as the blue light emanating from Buddha’s hair symbolizes universal love and compassion for all sentient beings, the blue color in the Buddhist flag represents universal compassion and peace.
  2. Just as the yellow light radiating from Buddha’s skin symbolizes the attainment of liberation and omniscience through relying on the Middle Way that avoids extremes, the yellow color in the flag represents the Middle Way that avoids the extremes of eternalism and nihilism.
  3. Just as the red light emanating from Buddha’s flesh symbolizes the blessings that flow from Buddhist practice, the red color in the flag represents perfect realization, wisdom, virtue, merit, and dignity attained through practice.
  4. Just as the white light radiating from Buddha’s bones and teeth symbolizes the purity of Buddha’s teachings and the possibility of attaining liberation and omniscience through them, the white color in the flag represents the purity and timelessness of the Buddha’s teachings, which remain unstained by faults and lead to liberation regardless of time and space.
  5. Just as the orange light emanating from Buddha’s palms, soles, and lips symbolizes the unwavering nature of Buddha’s teachings, the orange color in the flag represents the essence of Buddhist teachings, rich in wisdom, strength, and dignity.
The Buddhist flag in our downstairs hall
Our front gate, Tibetan and prayer flags.

Eight Auspicious Symbols:

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Curtains on our guest room and library doors.

Here is the English translation of the Tibetan text , describing the Eight Auspicious Symbols:

  1. The Wheel: Symbolizes the teaching of the Dharma (the Three Baskets) and the transmission of the Three Trainings to disciples.
  2. The Parasol: Represents the dispelling of the heat of suffering and afflictions for sentient beings.
  3. The Victory Banner: Symbolizes the defeat of Mara and non-Buddhist opponents, and the complete perfection of the major and minor marks of enlightenment.
  4. The Endless Knot: Represents the complete perfection of all qualities and the possession of the five wisdoms.
  5. The Right-Turning Conch Shell: Symbolizes the melodious sound of the Buddha’s speech proclaiming the Dharma.
  6. The Vase: Represents being completely filled with the essence of good qualities and serving as a support for pure merit.
  7. The Lotus: Symbolizes being in the world but uncontaminated by it, untainted by the impurities of karma and afflictions.
  8. The Golden Fish: Represents the abandonment of all faults and obstacles.

The text also mentions a quote from the Mahayana sutra called “The Stacked Auspicious Ones,” which describes how these eight symbols relate to different parts of the Buddha’s body and qualities. It concludes with an aspiration for auspiciousness and well-being through these symbols.

Dorjee visited us in Mysore with a gift of a Buddhist flag and helped us better understand the auspicious symbols

The passage notes that while there are more detailed explanations and interpretations of these symbols available, this brief description should suffice as an introduction to their meanings.

Bring on the Cake.

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The delicious cake complete with family.
Manjula’s Memory Tree decorated with hanging messages and wishes.
Delicious cake didn’t last long devoured by, from left : SB, Ina, Stephen, John and Satish.

Not forgetting Lucie being spoilt by Ina.

And then again, not satisfied with one we had to have another.

This time following the theme of the radiant sun that Manjula brought into our lives and still appears exactly when it’s needed.

Ina worrying the sun is about to explode

Gathered today on Manjula’s bench, next to Manjula’s garden, eating Manjula’s radiantness cake and celebrating her wonderfulness on her 51st birthday celebrations that have already gone on for a week. we have Kaveri, Radhika, Maria, John, Ina, Lucie and Stephen.

Please note Ina is naughty, bribing Lucie for affections with cake.

Italian crazy hair accompanies us to deliver Kaveri back to school.

That’s after Mr No experience was coerced into decorating Kaveri’s palm

Next day

SB couldn’t miss out and had to have more cake….

Yes that’s two pieces. One was supposed to be for her son Naveen.

Happy Birthday.

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I’m in the park to wish Manjula happy birthday and hang out with billet-Doux, butterflies (messengers from Madam) and too many mosquitoes!

Here’s the lovely video created by Faizan through which many old and new friends have met Manjula.

My ulterior motive on being here was to be security for the flowers and stop people stealing them.

I failed

But it can’t affect our celebration of her wonderfulness.

As I completed a video call to my son Oliver in Vancouver, —and realised I was due back to make breakfast—three sets of neighbours walking in the park saw Manjula’s poster and wanted to know her story. I’d never met them before a mom her son , another young woman and an elder.

We all shared smiles and joy.

Celebrating Manjula

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We begin remembering Manjula on what would have been her 51st birthday.

Here are our current guests Ina— the stalwart— who has visited us at Mysore Bed and Breakfast, almost every year for at least a month (with a break during the pandemic) and John, also a ‘glutton for punishment’ as he’s a returner —who we haven’t yet scared away — Settling in and helping us plan our rememberances.

Vasanth, Sowbaghya and I visited the nursery to get birthday flowers for Manjula’s garden. Unfortunately I didn’t get a photo of Priyanka, the friendly young woman shopping there. She donated a plant, on hearing why we were there..

How cool is that?

John

made a lovely ‘short’ of our first stage. . 🤭🤪

Next …. SB arrives with the first of three, yes three cakes….

and the family hanging out in the park ….

Neighbours appreciating Manjula’s bench.